Ahoy, mateys! I’ve come across something that could be a great value to ye. No, not gold, silver, or jewels. No spices, frankincense, or rum in this chest o’goodies. Nope, today’s plunderin’ is all about runnin’ into a sea serpent and how to live to tell the tale.
There’s a pyrate called Captain Mako who managed to create a sort of pyrate aid book with all manner of sea beasties documented. It’s a comprehensive list, but what makes Mako’s book extremely useful for sailin’ the high seas is that beyond the list of beasties, he also tells you exactly how to survive if you sail into one.
It’s a useful tome of knowledge that I, for one, keep on board my ship at all times. I must admit that my experience with beasties of the sea is quite limited, and…well…there are one or two of these monsters that make me a little nervous. Scared even. And the sea serpents…they terrify me. So, upon receiving Mako’s book, I immediately began a plunder for information about sea serpents.
The Great Orm
When I saw this entry, I nearly soiled my armor…erm…my breeches. I knew that “orm” is an Old Norse word for dragon, so I broke out in a cold sweat when I read that these terrifying land wyrms could also be found in the ocean. Blimey!! The Scandinavian oceans are already the home of krakens, (proper krakens that are HUGE!), and now I find out that there are sea serpents up north as well, lurking under the surface waiting for a delicious pyrate ship snack to sail by! Save me!
Large enough to wrap its coils around your ship, the Great Orm sea beastie will drag you, your ship, and crew down into the icy depths with ease. Don’t bother trying to kill it with guns or spears…this beastie can heal itself! However, Captain Mako does offer a strategy, though: Run. Raise sails and run with the wind as fast as you can. It’s not very like a pyrate to run, I know, but in this case, bravado = death by sea serpent. Just run.
Yer gonna need some time to raise those sails and make your escape. Captain Mako tells us that the Great Orm doesn’t like fire or high pitched sounds. The good captain recommends that you ring every ship bell, blow every bosun whistle, and bang everything that you can to create a cacophony of noise. Oh, and screaming doesn’t hurt. (NOT a problem!) If you get enough noise goin’, the sea serpent will begin to convulse in a spasm and thus be unable to nab ya. At this point, SAIL AWAY!!
(Crossing Scandinavian sailing OFF my plundering list!) Well, I think that’s enough sea beastie talk for now. I’m feelin’ a little anxious.
To help you survive the monsters of the sea, I highly recommend getting’ yerself a copy of Sea Beasties- A Pirate’s Guide to the Denizens of the Deep: being a record by Captain Mako on how to spot, kill, avoid being killed by and profit from … for the benefit of the greenhorn pirate.
A very tastefully produced beastiary of…sea beasties. Thanks, Captain Mako!
Next time…Screamin’ Parrots…until then, keep plunderin’
Virginia Chandler 